All’s fair in love and war.  What does that saying really mean?Are they presuming that the two are very similar?Now it isn’t for sure that that is what they were trying to say, but there sure are a lot of things that are the same.

The things that are the same I guess are when the two turns from love into war.  It may still be love between the two but they are at each other like it is war.  I have seen this first hand doing couples therapy San Diego.A couple that used to be in love now is a couple in a constant fight.It is my main purpose is to be able to bring peace between the couple.And to bring back that once great love between the two.

So what are a few signs of trouble to look for?  One of the biggest warning signs is communication.Or should I put it this way, no communication.For all relationships, being able to communicate is critical.Since it is crucial, if you as a couple are able to know that there is less communication, that is a sign.It is a sign or warning of trouble.  Whether I am doing couples counseling or  marriage counseling in San Diego I see it all the time.Because in essence if the couple is not able to communicate, any little problem can turn into a big problem.  Proper communication helps avoid that.

So as a family counselor San Diego one of the biggest things I do is try to teach the couple how to communicate.One of the keys to unlocking the ability to communicate is the ability to listen.Most people when they think of communicating think it is about talking.  But really if you don’t listen well, you don’t really understand each other.  So by helping the couple listen better their communication improves greatly.

By being able to recognize a sign like that, a couple will be better able to spot trouble starting.Now if the couple can spot this problem early in their relationship, they might be able to avoid some serious problems. From what I have witnessed, the optimum way to solve some problems is to completely avoid them.  But if not recognized early, best way to solve them is to learn how to communicate.Sounds basic but what it can do is have a major role in the problem.

Marriage is often called the sacred union.As it should be.  After all, when a happy couple say “I do” they are agreeing to be with each other till death do them part.Even when times get bad, during sickness and poorer.

Obviously you noticed that the health and richer part I didn’t include.Because those times are usually the easiest often times.

But regardless of the situation, if you find your marriage in trouble, keeping a marriage happy and healthy can become a struggle.  It is during this time a family therapist San Diego might be the best option.

Because if the problems start to happen too often, it will probably be headed to a divorce.Problems such as constant arguing, loss of trust, no intimacy, despising one another, etc.

When these things do start happening, the most important thing the couple should do is seek a marriage counselor.  why?  Because although a couple may not feel like it is, most marriage therapists have seen it all.And from that experience is what they use to help those marriages in trouble.

So why does marriage therapy or couples therapy work?  Well I would like to share some insights from my experience as a San Diego marriage therapist.

Several factors beginning with safety.A good therapist is able to offer to the couple an environment they can feel safe in.An environment that they are not used to where they have their fights.

This stops the angry or hysterical outburst that happens when they are in a familiar environment.

Second, as we told you earlier, this is not something new to them.This presents an opportunity for the therapist to share with the couple his experience of whether what they are going through is normal.

Third, they help in communications.Often that is usually one of the big reasons for a troubled marriage.When the troubles begin, each individual can start to become defensive which makes communication difficult.  The therapist can help open those lines.

Fourth, they will be helpful to the couples in regards to problem solving skills.Obviously, there are issues.And the better equipped the married couple is, the more able they will be to solve their problems.

Finally, they are able to help the married couple to better understand the situation.  They do this through helping them in listening, sharing feelings that may be difficult to express, and then interpret it all.

As you can tell, when their is trouble in the marriage, often the best way to fix it is through therapy.If you do find your situation is similar to this, go seek some help.  Take it from my experience doing marriage counseling San Diego.